Self-help is often regarded as good, right? And in most cases it is. But, as I will be sketching soon, proper general self-help advice can really ruin your goals and ensure that you don’t become a better version of yourself. Let’s look at the Self-help tips you should try to avoid.
This is because not all recommendations are made in the same way. Part of it, although well-intentioned, can get you off course and may do more harm than good.
These self-help myths that you see below are those that you should think twice about. Thus understanding the Self-help tips you should try to avoid can help me aim for the height without breaking myself.
#1. Shoot Perfectionism
Now you may think that this sounds like a worthy goal to strive for. But you would be mistaken because this is one of the Self-help tips you should try to avoid
Perfectionists are almost never satisfied with what they are doing – so they spend much longer to complete something that they should do.
For example, I know for sure that you have come across perfectionists at your workplace. When they have the task of creating a PowerPoint presentation or writing a report, they somehow manage to do these things two or three times longer than other members of their team.
The problem is that they often get stuck in the dark world of details. And that is why they are driven to constantly re-evaluate, change and edit their work.
And the amount of time they have spent perfecting something can be better spent elsewhere. After all, nothing is actually perfect, so it makes no sense to strive for it.
Perfectionists are actually trapped in a home-made mental prison. If you have perfectionist tendencies, I recommend doing the following:
Leave the “All or Nothing” mindset – instead of just doing things that you know you can do perfectly, you are open to taking actions that you are not good at or comfortable with. This allows you to constantly increase your skills and experience.
Strive for 95% perfection – do this and you will complete your tasks in an accomplished and professional manner. And you will also complete them in time. It tries to make something 100% perfect that will kill your productivity and output.
Set realistic goals – instead of dreaming too big (like wanting to be a success at night), set goals to a feasible level. Doing this increases your confidence while keeping your feet firmly on the ground.
Focus on the big picture – as I said before, perfectionists often get caught up in the details. To prevent this, I recommend that you always keep an eye on the bigger picture.
For example, if you create a document for the proposed purchase of new software, make sure that you include only the necessary details. Too much information is a waste of your time – and also the time of the other people working on the project.
The following is the general self-help belief which denotes that;
#2. Multi-tasking is the real deal
I am sure you have often heard or read about the power of multitasking in recent years. It seems to have become a whole trend. Yet it is one of such Self-help tips you should try to avoid.
But I am not someone who follows trends that lead to failure.
Multitasking may seem like the holy grail of productivity, but for 98% of employees, it is actually the opposite.
That’s because these people use poor multitasking methods that look like this:
Try to do two things at the same time.
Constantly switch to new tasks without completing the original things they were working on.
Quickly cycle back and forth between tasks, creating the illusion that they belong to the 2% of effective multitaskers.
The truth is that human brains are not designed to do this kind of “cognitive shaking.” It simply leads us to a messy and confused mental state full of something called ‘attention remnants’.
This means that we are distracted by thinking about one task while working on another. There have been some interesting multitasking studies that have shown that:
Constantly switching between tasks can cost you around 40% or 16 hours of your working week. That corresponds to losing two working days a week.
Multitasking can ensure that you perform as if you have lost 10-15 points on your IQ score. In other words, you will not be as smart or effective as you could be.
In my opinion, multitasking is not only overrated, but it is even dangerous for your productivity.
It’s much better just to focus on the task. Finish it. And then go to the next one.
This next tip is one that is constantly being discussed in chat shows, in newspapers, and in the self-help section.
#3. The objective for work-life balance
What do you think when you hear the term “work-life balance”?
A dream existence in which you work 20 hours a week and rest for your free time and pleasure?
This is how most self-help gurus try to sell it to you. But not me because it is one of the Self-help tips you should try to avoid
I have a very different view on the balance between work and life: it is called harmony between work and life.
The healthy harmony between work and life must begin by finding its purpose. And, once you’ve found it, you will naturally enjoy the work you do, and it will no longer be a case of dividing your life into:
The bad – work
The good: free time
With the purpose of guiding you, you will be enthusiastic and passionate about what you do, and you will work the hours that are necessary to achieve your goals. And, your enthusiasm for your work will naturally move to your free time.
As an example, imagine that you have worked for 12 years in the administration department of a local insurance company. You enter every business day to process claim after claim after claim. You find the destructive work of souls. But, you keep doing it, since you pay the bills.
One day, however, you decide that there should be more in life. And this starts in a period of self-search, which finally leads him to discover what he would really like to do with his life: travel the world on behalf of a charity that helps people help.
After digging up his purpose, he feels strongly driven to make it happen. It takes you almost six months, but in the end, you get a job with an international charity that helps people around the world affected by natural disasters.
The work takes him to dozens of different countries, and he enjoys every minute of his work. It is satisfying and rewarding. And, far from work, he loves telling his friends and family all about his travels.
His purpose has renewed him and given him the perfect harmony between work and life.
The last self-help tip I want to talk about is …
#4. Never Postpone
The big winners are people who never delay.
In my experience of working with dozens of successful entrepreneurs, prioritizing their tasks is much more important than worrying about postponing. This is one major Self-help tips you should try to avoid.
Let me explain what I mean.
You are working on an email to a colleague about a meeting that will be held next week. But, as you type the words in the email, your desk phone suddenly rings. He is one of his main clients, and they have an urgent need for the assistance of his company, and they are happy to pay the best dollars to do the job.
In this case, you:
A: Tell the client that you will receive it shortly, but then re-write your email to your colleague.
B: Tell the client that they will attend your request immediately and then re-elaborate your email once the high priority task is completed.
Well done! I’m sure you chose the second answer. And, it is absolutely the right thing to do.
Sure, you’ll be putting off when it comes to your email, but you’ll also be helping to complete a much larger goal that has an urgent deadline.
As you can see, procrastination has its place when you learn to prioritize your tasks.
Having known these few Self-help tips you should try to avoid, you have to go on with it and apply it in your everyday life in other to get used to it and achieve effectiveness.